Maltese people are wondering when the day will finally arrive when Born Again Christians discover a cure for being a Born Again Christian.
The fundamentalist sect made the local news again this week when, during an interview on F Living, Christian singer Phylisienne Brincat claimed an autistic child had been cured through prayer.
“Every night before bed I plead to the Virgin Mary to intercede with God on behalf of all the poor souls who’ve been afflicted with Born Again Christianity. Basically, I’m trying to pray the cray cray away,” said 64-year-old Catholic Mary Bonello from Paola.
“I go to church every Sunday but those extremist nut jobs and their American bullshit make me want to kneel down and worship Richard Dawkins,” said Michael Grech, 52, from Pembroke.
“From what I know about the group, being a Born Again Christian means you used to be a cunt, and now you’re a cunt who loves Jesus, said 22-year old Mark Caruana from Qormi.
Born Again Christianity first made the news in Malta several years ago, when Matthew Grech, also a singer, claimed that the River Of Love church had cured him of being gay.
He has since taken part in X Factor Malta in an attempt to earn a place at the Eurovision Song Contest.
“I’m disappointed I never got to go to Israel and attend an after-show orgy to show how powerful the will of God is,” he said.