The only way for the Nationalist Party to end its internal war is for Bernard Grech and Adrian Delia to fuck, according to various political analysts.
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Divisons in the PN have once again boiled over in recent weeks, with the respective factions of the leader and former leader of the Opposition publicly sniping at each other.
With the party once again performing disastrously in polls, the party is desperately searching for a way to become electable again.
“While conventional wisdom states PN will continue to be dysfunctional while both Grech and Delia are in the party, in reality all they have to do is release the huge sexual tension that clearly exists between them,” said Maltatoday journalist James Debono.
“They pretend to be rivals but it’s pretty obvious they’re hot for each other. They should agree to meet, get drunk on wine, air their grievances, and then rail each other senseless,” agreed Manuel Delia.
“That’s how Labour always presents a united front. At the first sign of internal conflict, they get together and have an orgy at Mile End. I took part in several and everyone agreed I was the best at sex,” explained author and blogger Mark Camilleri.
“Just fuck already,” wrote Times of Malta columnist Ranier Fsadni.
While agreeing with the various pundits that the idea could work, Professor Imona Jetski from the American University of Malta said there were still potential pitfalls.
“They might still argue about who would be the top and who the bottom. Personally I think Grech is the bottom,” she said.
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