A man has been described as delusional for thinking he will enjoy New Year’s Eve celebrations in Valletta this evening.
The man, 25-year-old Mark Zammit from Qormi, is planning to attend the event in St George’s square with his girlfriend.
“I’m sure it’ll be great. I’ll find parking easily, the weather will hold up, and it won’t be so busy that it feels too crowded and unpleasant, Zammit said.
“I haven’t checked which bands are playing but I’m sure they’ll be some of Malta’s most talented musicians, and not some Eurovision has-beens and two-bit DJs who should’ve retired in the 90s.”
Speaking to Bis-Serjetà, psychologist Aaron Debono said:
“Mr Zammit is what we in this business would call ‘completely fucking deluded’.”
“Of course it’s going to be shit. It’s a free public event in Malta with least common denominator entertainment. It’s like Beerfest without the warm weather and the alternative stage.
“At some point, while he’s fruitlessly trying to get work himself up to the level of excitement that’s expected of you on this day, he’ll probably get shoved in the back by a woman trying to maneuver a push chair through the crowd while yelling ‘GĦANDI T-TFAL ĦI.’ over a cover version of Dance Monkey.
Asked if there were any more enjoyable options available, Debono said:
“Unless you’re at a house party with friends, not really. All these over-priced black-tie parties are shit. But by all means, go and enjoy watered-down drinks while spending the countdown in the queue for the toilet.
“Personally what I love doing on New Year’s Eve is pretending to be a taxi driver at 3am and then driving away when people approach me. Never gets old.”
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