New Prime Minister Robert Abela is aiming to piss away any goodwill he has with non-Labour voters in record time.
Following Abela’s appointment as prime minister two weeks ago, he was given the benefit of the doubt by several people, who were hoping he would represent a clean break from the tainted Muscat administration.
However, Abela has since given a consultancy job to former police commissioner Lawrence Cutajar, made Konrad Mizzi the head of an OSCE delegation, and transferred the hunting regulator to the ostensibly unrelated Gozo Ministry, which is headed by an actual hunter.
He has also indicated that he will do anything about rampant over-development, and has given no indication that he will stop environmental destruction such as that which is currently happening in Wied Qirda and Attard.
Speaking to Bis-Serjetà, Abela revealed this was all part of a coordinated strategy to annoy people who didn’t blindly vote for Labour no matter what.
“I really want to lay down a marker for pissing off non-diehard Labour voters in the shortest time possible. Did you really think I was going to appease those who are critical of the government when we have a freakin’ 40K majority? I could jerk off on the Great Siege monument and our supporters would say I was just cleaning it.”
The Prime Minister was mum on what he would do next to enrage people.
“Maybe I’ll give Keith Schembri a consultancy job too. Or make Chris Cardona the chairman of some women’s rights committee. But that would probably make people actually riot. Then again, I can’t wait to show everyone how tough I am,” he said before jutting his jaw forward and breaking this reporter’s microphone in half.
