A man has said he would be willing to forego a night of passion with actress Eva Green if it meant he got to see a crying Konrad Mizzi placed in handcuffs.
The former energy minister was back in the spotlight last week, as it emerged he helped broker yet another suspicious deal that involved Malta paying over the odds for a wind farm in Montenegro, the profit from which ended up going to Yorgen Fenech.
“If a genie appeared before me, and said he would grant me one of two wishes: either have an evening of steamy, kinky, freaky sex with Eva Green, or I get to see one of the 17 Black gang being led out of their homes in handcuffs in the middle of the night and bundled into the back of a police car, I’d tell that genie to give me the latter,” said James Caruana, 36, from Rabat, adding that he would make the same choice even if the aforementioned night with the star of Casino Royale and Kingdom Of Heaven also involved handcuffs.
“Seeing Eva Green in The Dreamers was my sexual awakening as a teenager, and whenever I’ve seen her in subsequent films, I smile at the screen like an idiot. But even her mesmerising eyes and hypnotic curves couldn’t tear my attention away from the sight of Konrad Mizzi facing sweet, sweet justice,” he said.
Asked why Mizzi and not Joseph Muscat or Keith Schembri, Caruana explained:
“Don’t get me wrong, I’d love to see them all in prison. But I think Joseph and Keith would still act dignified in defeat, whereas I can imagine Konrad breaking down completely – his rubbery face getting all red and swollen as he bawls like a child. And in between all the sobbing and sniffling he’d cry, “Keith ġiegħlni to do it! It’s his tort!”
“Honestly that mental image is the only thing that gets me through some days. Then again, I probably have more chance of shagging Eva Green than Konrad Mizzi ever seeing the inside of a prison cell. But a man can dream.”
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