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Coronavirus deliberately avoiding Malta so it doesn’t catch stupidity

Karl Stennienibarra

The Covid-19 coronavirus has said it is deliberately avoiding Malta so it doesn’t catch stupidity.

While Covid-19 has made it to almost every other EU country – and despite most cases in Europe originating in nearby Italy – it is yet to officially reach Malta.

“I have absolutely no plans to enter Malta, due to the dangerous epidemic of stupidity that has plagued the country for a number of years. So don’t worry, Maltese people, you don’t have to stockpile a thing because there’s no way I’m putting myself at risk of catching your stupidity, ” the virus said.

“A lot of other viruses tell me: ‘But Covid-19, stupidity is everywhere. Why are you worried about the Maltese strain of stupidity in particular?’ Because I follow their news and read their comments on social media, that’s why.”

The virus criticised the lack of information available to diseases who were thinking of entering Malta.

“In the adverts it’s all sun and sea and nice friendly people ripe for infection. But then you do your research and find out the place is infested with deadly levels of idiocy. Just because I’m a virus doesn’t mean I don’t value my own intelligence. No sir, you can keep your densely populated, ageing population. I’m going to Slovenia instead.”