The thermal scanners that were being used to check for symptoms of the Coronavirus at Malta International Airport are no longer operational, after Ira Losco caused them to malfunction due to her being too much of a hottie.
The two scanners – which are being used to check for signs of fever in those coming into Malta – had only been set up yesterday, when Losco returned from a holiday in Spain on a Ryanair flight this morning.
When the singer – who was looking as stunning as ever – walked past the thermal imaging cameras in the arrivals hall, the attached monitors were engulfed in white light and sparks began to fly out of them.
“It appears Ms Losco’s hotness was too much for the scanners to handle. And honestly, who can blame them? She’s a total smoke show,” said Nicholas Tonna, the Ministry of Health official in charge of airport screening.
Tonna pleaded with Losco not to travel again in the near future.
“Please Ms Losco, there’s no need to go abroad when so many people here want to bask in your radiance. And because Konrad Mizzi sold the hospitals to Vitals for peanuts, we can’t afford to keep buying new scanners.”
Ira Losco was not available for comment, a fact that caused great anguish to this journalist, who fainted when she visited his secondary school in 2003.
Now that the thermal scanners are out of commission, officials will begin taking passengers’ temperatures rectally.
