Lippu Bongailas – Sports Correspondent
Malta has won a game of football. Bloody hell.
After a quick check to make sure I hadn’t unwittingly stumbled into a parallel universe, or woken up from a weird dream, I can confirm that Malta scored more goals than the opposing team. Get the fuck in.
This phenomenon normally happens roughly once every 100 years.
With only 10 men as well, Jesus Christ.
Basta bdew iparlaw fuq iz-żobb ta’ Viking spirit aqqalla.
Seriously, Ray Farrugia for President, mela that bald old owl jew?
You know what? Every single player should be given a National Order of Merit. Even the black ones.
Cynics will no doubt point out that the opposing team was only a tiny North Atlantic archipelago with a population slightly higher than that of Gozo, and 20 times as many sheep.
These unpatriotic cockroaches will be hanged and their severed heads put on spikes atop the entrance to Valletta.
Meanwhile in other sports news, the Maltese national rugby team also won today, but honestly who gives a flying fuck about rugby anyway?
