People who live in Malta must evolve to breathe exhaust fumes and construction dust, Prime Minister Joseph Muscat insisted this morning.
Muscat was speaking during an interview on One Radio.
“To make sure we carry on this period of economic growth, we need to continue constructing new buildings and getting more people on the roads,” Muscat said.
“Unfortunately, the particulate matter – or as I like to call, ‘progress powder’ – that all this growth is generating will eventually result in Malta becoming completely uninhabitable. I want all Maltese people to be able to enjoy their slice of the economy cake, but they won’t be able to do that if they have to spend all their money on asthma inhalers and funerals for their loved ones.”
Muscat said the government had considered the possibility of subsidising oxygen masks, but had deemed the idea too unrealistic.
“Instead, we need people to be self-sufficient and evolve lungs that can filter out excess progress powder. In the words of Charles Darwin: “Thus, from the war of nature, from famine and death, the most exalted object which we are capable of conceiving, namely, boutique hotels, directly follows.””
The Prime Minister added that the government had already taken steps to accelerate the evolutionary process.
“Normally such a big physiological leap forward would take thousands of years to achieve, but Chris Fearne has started doing experiments on foreigners to try and speed things up a bit.
“On that note, I strongly advise people to stay away from the disused quarry in Mosta, and to ignore any growling noises coming from it.”
