Karl Stennienibarra
Edwin Vassallo has destroyed the entire fruit section of PAVI supermarket with his flamethrower this afternoon.
After posting an image on Facebook that warned people about the dangers of discoloured bananas that had been injected with HIV-infected blood by Satanists, the Nationalist MP was spotted parking his car at the Qormi supermarket soon after.
Eye witnesses told Bis-Serjetà that Mr Vassallo was wearing flame-proof military fatigues and carrying a fuel tank on his back when he headed straight to the fruit & veg aisle.
“In the name of God, I must cleanse this place of demonic banana AIDS with righteous fire!” Mr Vassallo is reported to have yelled as he released a powerful jet of napalm that ignited and instantly incinerated several wooden fruit crates.
After burning several kilos of bananas, apples, oranges and other fruits to a crisp, Mr Vassallo is said to have knelt reverently, looked to the ceiling and whispered solemnly, “I have done thy bidding, oh Lord.”
“OK. Next up – Smart,” Vassallo was heard saying as he left the scene.
