SiGMA founder and CEO Eman Pulis has promised that next year’s convention will shut down Malta International Airport.
This year’s convention, which took place in Marsa last week, caused major traffic jams across the Norther Harbour Region.
“Ever since I conned hundreds of students with a shitty New Year’s Eve party back in 2006, my main aim in life has been to make the most money while causing the maximum amount of disruption to regular people,” Pulis told Bis-Serjetà.
“Don’t get me wrong – I love making millions from organising scummy igaming conventions. But seeing all those plebs complain because they spent hours stuck in traffic to get home from their shitty little jobs made me a bit hard,” he added.
“So next year, I want to go even further. I don’t just want to shut down the roads – I want to shut down the skies too. I’ll bring over so many gambling and crypto dickheads that the airport won’t be able to cope. Flights cancelled, holidays ruined, children crying. I’m getting a tingle again just thinking about it.”
Pulis said that even if the airport plan were a success, it would not be the end of his chaotic ambitions.
“In 2025, the aim will be to shut down the Freeport so that no food can get into the country. Then, the convention will play host to gladiatorial combat between starving people fighting to win a loaf of bread. It will be the greatest event Malta has ever seen.”
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