A Maltese man’s entire personality consists of making fun of non-dairy milk alternatives.
Robert Sammut, 45, from Birkirkara, takes every opportunity to ridicule the idea of switching to oat, almond, soy, or any milk that doesn’t come from a cow.
When Sammut reacted angrily on Facebook to the news that the price of milk would be increasing by 15 per cent, it was suggested to him that he could switch to another type of milk if the two ever reached the same price.
“What do you mean, ‘other type of milk’? Only weak vegans would drink that shit. Do you want me to have brittle bones? I only drink real milk not liberal piss,” Sammut replied.
Upon further investigation, it was revealed that Sammut posts almost exclusively about how much he hates alternative milks, as well as about how much he loves eating meat in front of vegetarians.
Professor Imona Jetski, who lectures at the American University of Malta, said Sammut’s behavior was becoming increasingly common.
“Men like Robert feel like their fragile masculinity is under threat, so they grasp onto stuff they think makes them manly. It’s just weird that anyone would think drinking something that came out of a cow’s tit is somehow more manly than something that came out of an almond’s tit, which is of course how almond milk is made.”
LOVE WHAT I DO?
Creating Malta’s most serious news requires time and effort. Support me by signing up to my Patreon for as little as €3 a month. It takes less than two minutes, and every little helps.
